Jackson H., a creativity coach in Tulsa, Oklahoma, asks:
Dear Eric:
All my clients are telling me that they have no time to do the things that they say that they want to do. I’m sure that this is pretty much true – so, how can I help if they just don’t have the time?
Thanks, Jackson!
There is never a perfect time to create, as we are always in the middle of things, including our own formed personality. And, yes, we often have very little spare time to attend to even our most important life purposes. But a lack of time is never the complete issue or the “real” issue, whether it’s a client saying she has no time to write or us saying that we have no time to build our coaching practice.
One of the ways that our clients avoid doing their work is to fall back on the “time” issue: that there just isn’t enough time in the day to do everything they want to do. There is always a measure of truth to such concerns, often a really large measure. But I never let “I don’t have the time” end the discussion. That claim is only the beginning!
For instance, there is virtually no one who doesn’t watch half-an-hour or an hour of television a day. Doesn’t that prove the point, that some amount time really is available?
+ If you don’t want to trade that hour of television-watching for an hour of creating, then not wanting to trade that hour is the issue.
+ Maybe you’re too tired and can only watch television. In that case, being too tired is the issue.
+ Maybe you’ve spent your brain cells on your day job. In that case, having spent your brain cells is the issue.
+ Maybe you husband makes a face if you try to head to the studio to write. If so, then your relationship with your husband is the issue.
In none of these four scenarios is time the issue!
There is virtually no one who doesn’t have an hour a day available for creating. So, as coaches, we can’t let time stand as the issue. We have to (gently, carefully, but energetically) get out from behind that convenient excuse and look at what is really going on. This is an important face of support: not letting “time” stand as the issue, even if a client presents that as “the” issue.
This time issue is naturally most pressing for someone with a day job (which includes raising children). When a client has a day job (or more than one day job), I first acknowledge that reality. I certainly don’t want to ignore or underestimate that truth.
Then I would likely say, “That probably means that you will have to create first thing each morning, before you go off to work. Trying to create when you get home is so darned difficult, given that most of our brain cells are gone by that point.”
I try to sell clients on creating first thing each day, as that is the single most important change they can make in the movement from not creating to creating. If a client responds (as most clients will), “I’m not a morning person” or “That would mean I would have to get up at five in the morning,” my response would likely be something like, “Maybe your art is worth that to you?” or “But I know that your novel really matters to you, yes?”
Even for clients who are willing to make such a change, this change usually takes weeks and even months to institute. So, I like to keep monitoring a client’s progress in that regard by checking in: “How has trying to get up early to write worked for you this week?” This is one real face of support!
Time is a real, finite quantity. We are obliged to take it seriously. Clients can only do so much. But as true as that is, we want to be careful not to too quickly accept “time” as the issue. As likely as not, something else is going on.
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